Becoming a new parent involves significant life changes, including changes in couples’ sex lives. Researchers1 wanted to know how frequent sexual anxieties are after having a baby and whether they affect relationship happiness.
They polled a large number of new mother-and-father couples when their babies were between 3 and 12 months old. Almost 90% reported having more than ten sex-related concerns after the kid was born. These concerns produced moderate stress for both mothers and fathers.
Some differences emerged between mothers and fathers. Dads who were more concerned about sex had lower levels of relationship contentment with their partners. However, when mothers were more concerned about sex, it only decreased the father’s satisfaction, not the mother’s.
Furthermore, moms with more frequent sex worries resulted in reduced happiness for both parents. However, fathers’ more frequent fears had a less significant impact on happiness.
As a result, it appears that new mothers may require additional assistance in dealing with their numerous sex concerns following the birth of their child. New fathers may also require further assistance in coping with sex-related emotional distress. This is important for making both parents satisfied in their new parenting partnership.
The essential point is that sex concerns are very common among new mothers and fathers after having a baby. However, these concerns reduce both partners’ satisfaction in the partnership. Doctors should ask about this while seeing new parents to assist them deal with the obstacles and maintain their connection during the major life shift of having a kid.
Here are some strategies for regaining your rhythm after delivering a kid:
Take things slowly. Do not hurry into sex before you are ready. Cuddling, massages, and other physical activities might help you reconnect.
Use lubricant. Childbirth and hormonal changes can dry you out and make sex uncomfortable. Lubricant makes things go more smoothly.
Try new positions. A missionary may not feel fantastic just after a vaginal delivery. The girl on top allows you to adjust both depth and speed.
Speak honestly. Share your anxieties or discomfort so that you can work through them together. This is unfamiliar territory for both of you.
Make time for intimacy. Schedule date nights, even if it’s just at home after the baby goes to bed. Continue to nurture your relationship.
Focus on foreplay. If necessary, refrain from engaging in intercourse for some time. There are other ways to be intimate without it.
Be patient. Your sex urge is likely to return, but it may take some time. As you acclimate to being a parent, focus on reconnecting emotionally.
Seek aid if necessary. If the pain during sex persists, consult your doctor. Consider seeking treatment for interpersonal or sexual concerns.
The most important thing is to avoid placing pressure on yourself. Intimacy after a baby requires adaptability and communication. You have got this!
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